After being cooped up for over a year amidst the COVID-19 pandemic, many of us are seeking change. Moving to a new city allows us to explore unseen places, meet new faces, and truly start fresh. Change is good, but it can introduce a fair share of stressors. Studies have shown that moving to a new home is the most stressful life event, with divorce following close behind. So, what makes a move so stressful and how can we embrace the change?
Top Moving Stressors
It’s not just the idea of a big move that cultivates mountains of emotional stress, but it’s actually an accumulation of minor stressors that leave us feeling antsy.
Money
Moving isn’t inexpensive. The cost of packing, hiring a mover, shipping cars, and copious takeout runs can add up. However, there are ways to save.
You can rent a U-Haul and pack up your place on your own if you have friends and family members willing to help. You can also sell your furniture on Offer Up, Facebook Marketplace, and Craigslist ahead of time and buy fun pieces in your new haven. Instead of buying brand new moving boxes from Home Depot or Lowes, you can see if your local grocery store has any they can spare.
It is essential to assess the stress vs. the costs. While hiring a moving company can be pricier, it may be worth it to shield your mental health from an overwhelming to-do list. You know your personal limits better than anyone, so make sure you’re checking in and finding balance when you can.
Planning out your move at least 6 months in advance and setting a realistic budget can offset some of these stressors. In its essence, stress is worrying about something that may or may not happen. Having a game plan can help your brain feel like it has some sense of control over the situation. Your mental health will thank you for giving it some structure to use as a gauge when things start progressing. Having a baseline to check in with can help strengthen your perspective, reducing stress in the long run.
Time
Each step in the moving process takes time. Patience will be your favorite companion, as some of the changes will resolve on their own. Making a to-do list can help you see the progression from start to finish. The physical act of checking off a to-do list item sends a message to your brain that releases serotonin, putting stress in its place temporarily.
Changing your USPS address, getting Wi-Fi set up, creating an electricity account, mapping out your commute to work, and assessing the parking situation at your new pad are a few items to add to the moving checklist to get you started.
Show yourself a healthy dose of compassion when things take more time than you expect. You don’t have to get everything done at once. If you are able, taking a few days off work to get settled and start nesting can help make the change more manageable.
Meeting People
Many of us put a lot of pressure on finding the right soul tribe right off the bat. Close friendships take time — that’s what makes them so special. Enjoy the journey the best you can and trust that people will flow in and out of your life as they are meant to.
It’s also important to note that we can fill our social cups through casual encounters too. A quick conversation with your favorite barista, a smile at the grocery clerk, a quick joke with a passerby can all create opportunities for connection and joy.
You will eventually make friends, especially if you are willing to put yourself out there. Take a yoga class, join a Facebook group for your favorite hobby, and get to know your co-workers. Science shows that if you show up consistently, people are genetically wired to like you more. All you have to do is keep showing up and the universe will have your back.
Scheduling calls with friends and family can also provide comfort while you get the swing of things. You’re never alone, even if intrusive thoughts tell you otherwise. If you do struggle with depression or anxiety, joining online communities can help you feel seen and heard. Support groups, Instagram lives, and meetups exist and are yours for the taking.
Embracing Change While Moving
Whenever you find yourself overwhelmed with moving stress, remind yourself why you wanted to move in the first place. Gratitude is anxiety’s worst nightmare. Some helpful questions you can use to remind yourself what got you hyped about this move in the first place are:
What excites me most about this location?
Which restaurants do I want to visit first?
Do I know anyone from high school (yes, it’s okay to dig that deep) who lives here?
Are there any hikes or parks that I can check out to help me ground down?
Making a bucket list of top attractions and experiences in the area can also help remind you of all you have to look forward to in your upcoming move.
It’s also helpful to remember that self-care will carry you down every turn you take. Making sure you get a good night’s rest, getting into a solid meditation practice, and eating three balanced meals a day is a good place to start.
All of your unique self-love activities are always there for you too! Your aromatherapy diffuser, your pen and paper, your tennis racquet, and your video games aren’t going anywhere. In fact, putting yourself in a new situation might allow these slow joys to thrive and develop into something more.
Even keeping up with simple rituals, like picking out your favorite bouquet at the market or pouring yourself a warm cup of tea, can remind your mind that everything is going to be okay. Trust yourself and the micro-habits you’ve been building your entire life. This is your chance to reinvent yourself and show up as your most authentic self yet. You’re exactly where you’re meant to be.
Your move may not be stress-free, but a healthy dose of stress can help motivate you to stay organized and empowered in your choice. Keep these tips in your back pocket and moving day will be celebrated as an exciting day, not a stressful one.
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